Rejection feels like sometimes a icky feeling.
We’ve all been rejected. Rejected by our parents, family members, people from school, people of the opposite sex, schools that we wanted to get into, courses that we applied for, jobs that we dreamed for and so forth.
To say we have not all been rejected at one point would be a lie. And to say that it doesn’t hurt our feelings when we get rejected, would also be a lie.
So since it seems like rejection is a normal part of life, how do we embrace rejection with open arms?
I love the story of Joseph and his brothers in Genesis in the bible:
Here’s Joseph’s story in a nutshell:
Joseph has a dream given by God. He tells his brothers. His brothers reject him because they are jealous of the favour over his life. They throw him in a pit. Sell him into slavery. He is a slave in Egypt. He works himself up to leadership in Egypt through God. A leaders wife hits on him. He refuses. She lies to her husband and says he tried to rape her, who throws him in prison. He interprets dreams of 2 people in prison. One dies. One gets restored to his old job. King has a dream. Person who got restored from prison, tells King about Joseph and his gift of interpreting dreams. He interprets the Kings dream. Gets exalted in the kingdom. Saves Egypt from famine (because it was in the dream). He restores Egypt as well as saves his brothers from famine even though they don’t know that its him. They are scared, bow down and seek for forgiveness. He forgives them and they live happily ever after.
Phew. We got there.
And when I feel rejected, God always reminds me of how rejection may not be a bad thing. In the story of Joseph, Joseph had to be rejected by his brothers, thrown in a pit and sold to slavery to fulfil his destiny. If he hadn’t been rejected by his own brothers, he wouldn’t have saved Egypt from famine and a lot of people would have died as well as his own family.
So when we get rejected by something, do we take rejection as a knock to our ego or something greater?
I’ve been rejected many times before. You would say how could I have been? I’m pretty, privileged, lucky what do I have to worry about?
Well, first of all. I was never accepted in high school. I see people still stuck in their friendship circles or have had friends for years. I’m not friends with anybody from high school or primary school. And it’s not like I’ve not wanted to be accepted. I’ve wanted to be validated and wanted by other girlfriends. I wanted to be part of their clique. And sometimes I look at my past and go, “why can’t I have friends who have been there for me for years..” I either got backstabbed, hated on for no reason or simply I just didn’t fit in. And it wasn’t because I was bad or anyone else was bad.
Sometimes God takes you out of your comfort zone to get you into new depths. When he exalts you, he wants to bring you to new places. And sometimes those old friends can’t be with you. They either drag you down, or talk you out of your calling. (unless of course they are super super loving)
I used to this think that it was bad lucky not having a close girlfriend from when I was young. I would cry at night thinking there was something wrong with me. And thankfully now, God has given me beautiful girlfriends who I know love God as much as I do, and love me like their own sister.
But would I have been here today if I had been accepted by girls in high school?
Probably not. I would’ve been way to comfortable speaking to the same people, hanging with the same people and not spreading my wings. I’ve been rejected countless of times, from members of my own family. I’ve been rejected from countless amount of times from auditions, I’ve lost count. I’ve been broken up with, cheated on and rejected by men.
But how would it make me better by dwelling on my rejections that seeing how God has used it for his good? God uses everything, including our past. Every rejection may be a “not yet”, “not this one” not a “no”. Although, some may be closed doors.
I feel like rejection one has made me a better person. I had a grudge against every single people that rejected me for many many years. And most recently have seen how forgiveness is key to healing and moving into our destiny.
If we see it from God’s point of view, of him trying to develop us and move us towards our purpose on earth, we can celebrate our trials.
I love this:
3 And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; 4 and perseverance, character; and character, hope. (Romans 5:3-4)
Rejection is part of the process of building character.
If we can learn to thank God and be humble during the process, we can see that rejection may not necessarily be a bad thing.
The enemy can use rejection to divide, isolate and hurt.
But God can use it for his glory. Hallelujah!!